今回の Topic は、Official Guide to the TOEFL の Independent Essay 第１６問です。

１. Topic           

      If you could change one important thing about your home town, what would you change?   Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.

２. Struture

a) Thesis Statement (Introduction)                

      If I could change one important thing about my home town, I would enhance and promote our community center to foster inclusive and participatory culture in my neighborhood.

b) Body の部分を構成する３つの Paragraph の Main Idea は、

第１ Paragraph　最初に、自治体の行政担当に依頼してコミュニティー・センター拡張の予算を増加してもらう

第２ Paragraph　その機能が拡大されたコミュニティー・センターが主催する様々なプロジェクトやイヴェントへの住民の積極的参加を促す為に、その存在をプロモートする

第３ Paragraph　更に、地域住民のヴォランティアによるサポートを募り包括的な参加型の文化を育み、最終的に利他的な地域社会の実現を目指す

 

３. Sample   

     If I could change one important thing about my home town, I would enhance and promote our community center to foster inclusive and participatory culture in my neighborhood.                

     To begin with, I would ask the local government to spend more money on enhancing the community center.  A community center is a place where every member of the community can visit in order to join many activities to make the community more friendly and accessible.  With larger budget, it could launch several new projects for the community members to attend.  This would lead the community to serve as a safety-net to prevent the members from the state of “hikikoromi”.                                

     In addition, this enhanced and improved community center should be promoted to the members to be known.  Although the community center has played the crucial role to implement various activities and events for the members of the community, some members don’t know or utilize the center.  Therefore, we should launch campaigns to make the center well-known to the members and to promote attending diverse community projects and events.                                                                                                  

     Finally, I would ask the members of the community to volunteer to help the community center and its projects function as intended.  In this scheme, it is ideal for the members to engage in volunteer at least one field of their choice.  This means that the members are eventually both volunteers and beneficiaries.  And this mutually beneficial relations between the members would result in the creation of inclusive and participatory culture, and finally, altruistic society.                       

     It is true that some members are too busy working to participate in the community projects.  However, because of the three reasons I mentioned above, I would like to enhance and promote our community center if I could change one important thing about my home town.

 

To be continued.