今回の Topic は、Official Guide to the TOEFL の Independent Essay 第３５問です。

１. Topic           

         Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: people today spend too much time on personal enjoyment －doing things they like to do － rather than doing things they should do.

２. Struture

a) Thesis Statement (Introduction)                

        I disagree with the statement because the number of people who can afford to spend time on personal enjoyment is decreasing in developed countries and there are over 731 million people who have difficulty in accessing basic necessities in the developing countries.

b) Body の部分を構成する３つの Paragraph の Main Idea は、

第１ Paragraph　先進国においてさえ富裕層と貧困層との格差が拡大しており、貧困層は生活を楽しむ余裕はない

第２ Paragraph　自分の時間、エネルギー、金銭を犠牲にしてボランティア活動に従事する人々が大勢存在している

第３ Paragraph　現在でも、発展途上国では７憶三千万人の人々が極貧にあえいでいる

 

 ３. Sample          

     I disagree with the statement because the number of people who can afford to spend time on personal enjoyment is decreasing in developed countries and there are over 731 million people who have difficulty in accessing basic necessities in the developing countries.                                    

     To begin with, it has been widely reported that there is growing gap between the rich and the poor even in developed countries.  According to one estimate, over 80 per cent of Americans now live from paycheck to paycheck.  As a result, they have little choice but to give up personal enjoyment to pay their rents, utility bills, and credit card bills.  The same is true of Japan, where around 40 per cent of workforce is so called non-regular employees who struggle to make ends meet.  In that context, they can’t afford to spend time doing what they want.                                                       

     In addition, there is also growing number of people who engage in volunteer activities.  Every time serious natural disaster, such as an earthquake or typhoon, hits Japan, tens of thousands of volunteers come to help people in need.  In global level, international volunteer groups have provided humanitarian assistance in the least developed regions.  They dedicate their time, energy, and money to social activities.  I believe that we are inherently altruistic because human are social beings who need positive relationships with other people.                                                                                                                                                     

     Finally, there are still 731 million people, over 9 per cent of world’s population, who have difficulty in accessing basic necessities in life, such as healthcare, education, water, and sanitation.  Although the number of people who live in extreme poverty has reduced by more than half since 1990s, much remains to be done to eradicate poverty.  Many experts point out that globalization has benefited the world as a whole but the benefits have not distributed evenly.  Hundreds of millions people have been left behind the globalization.                                                          

     It is true that time will surely come when people all over the world could enjoy their lives sometime in the future.  However, I disagree with the statement due to the three reasons I mentioned above.   

 

To be continued.